Thursday, August 21, 2008

Sux Getting Old (#1 of many, I'm sure...)

Okay, so when I set-up this Blog, I wanted it to be an outlet geared more toward "Creativity" and "Positivity" - rather than a forum for "purging" my (more than occasional) negative thoughts...

And, for the most part, I'm gonna try to stay true to that...

OTOH, sometimes "Sh*t Happens" and you just can't avoid b*tching about it in some shape or form! I mean, hell, that's only HUMAN, right?!!

* * * * *
Interestingly, years ago, I had the opportunity (on more than one occasion) to tag along with my mom and my uncle (mom's brother) in the car for trips to Home Depot or "Monkey Wards" or wherever. And whenever the two of them would get in a car together, I'd get to hear this non-stop diatribe about their assorted health woes. "I'm sicker than you because...." ya-ya-ya...

"My sciatica is acting up!"

"You think that's bad?! My bursitis has been..."

I'd sit in the back of the car and finally yell out "WILL YOU TWO STOP IT ALREADY?!!! If I EVER reach a point in my life where I feel the need to 'compete' over 'who's sicker?' - I hope SOMEBODY has the DECENCY to just put a BULLET in my head and end it all!!!!"

Yeah, well...

I think the first sign of "getting old" happened around the time I was 35. I remember climbing onto one of the boats (Solitaire was my "home" and Tartan was my "office" for 6 yrs - for those who *haven't* been to my website yet ). I climbed up the steps and stepped onto the side-deck, slipped, did the splits (something I was *never* designed to do!!!), and landed on the dock.

I hurt for *weeks* after that!!!

Compare that to my twenties, when I used to break horses "for fun!" I can't tell you how many times I'd been bucked off, pitched into barbed-wire fences, kicked (with both hooves) in the stomach (and sent sailing across the stall!)... Back then, I used to "bounce!"

No more!

I had a later incident, in my late-30's, where I was attempting to mount Dante, my 17h Thoroughbred gelding. I was actually able to get my left-foot into a stirrup that *I swear* was at eye-level! I bounce-bounce-bounced on my right foot and attempted to pull myself up when the horse suddenly moved forward. I landed, quite badly, on my right foot. Twisted my ankle severely, and had a HELLUVA time driving myself home that night!!! Again, it required SEVERAL weeks for recovery!!!

...And as the years have passed, things certainly haven't improved!!!

Now I'm 45. As of last December (between Christmas and New Years'), I was diagnosed w/Type II Diabetes.

Do you think I got a nice "Garden Variety" version of Diabetes?! Ohhhhh, no! I have an EXTREMELY INSULIN-RESISTANT variant of Diabetes...

That has presented it's own unique set of challenges, not the least of which was finding a doctor who actually "took me seriously" and was willing to take on the challenge of figuring out what the hell to do with me!

[Here is where I *could* insert an endless litany and share truly frightening stories of medical ineptitude! But I'll "take the high road" for now and note that I *might* choose to share said rants later!!!]

I'll cut to the chase: Presently, I am being seen by an Assistant Professor at Stanford's Endocrinology Clinic. And, for the first time in my life, I feel like I am actually receiving "quality care" by someone who LISTENS to me and DISCUSSES/EXPLAINS things to me...

And that's pretty damned refreshing!

Just FYI - Ever since being diagnosed, I have become positively obsessive about eating low-carb. And even at that, my blood glucose has been "out of control." I track EVERYTHING I eat. I test my blood glucose a MINIMUM of 5x/day (usually closer to 10x/day). And I don't even want to share how much insulin I take (generally >=300u/day). So I'm definitely not "Garden Variety!"

Unfortunately, I feel like I've been completely "robbed" of a summer (and that is just downright criminal!!!). When my blood glucose is "out of control," I have ZERO energy and feel like a freakin' ZOMBIE! I'm "just now" starting to get my glucose #'s under control - but summer is almost over...

Anyway, I will undoubtedly share more info at some point in the future - I'm actually too tired (and too restricted, time-wise since DH will be home soon!) to "rant" about it now...

For now, I'm pleased to have found a Medical Professional who takes the time to LISTEN to me and DISCUSS the various options. I *finally* feel like I'm in "competent hands!" And I'm optimistic that things WILL improve!

We'll be changing my insulin regimen in the coming days - which will probably throw me into a tailspin (and maybe I'll post - if I do, brace yourself for incessant whining!). But I think (hope) the long-term gains will be worth it!

More to come, later...............


BTW - If you *think* you might be a candidate for diabetes (I know *I* was - mom's diabetic, and I seem to take-after "her side" of the family - BUT I was "in denial!"), here is a site you ABSOLUTELY, POSITIVELY MUST VISIT (I really, truly wished I'd stumbled onto it sooner, to be honest!) - Jenny is extremely knowledgeable and her website, and book, have been an absolute Godsend to me!!! (and I get "nothing" for referring folks to her site!)

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