Here we go again with the "Sorry I'm a Lousy Blogger" stuff (Unboxing a New Toy!)

Yeah.  Well.  Life Happens!

I'll skip the B.S. Apologies (particularly since I'm not even sure if anybody reads my crap regularly anyway!) and just dive right into the latest Adventure!

QT, the BQ-Ho, bought a brandy-new pellet grill!

I was at the SF Garden Show a couple of weeks ago - mostly looking for inspiration/motivation to get off my @$$ and get my garden ready for spring.  I was also doing "Reconnaissance Work" for me and P - since we are contemplating setting up a ceramic garden-art sales booth at this show, next year.

Turns out, the organizers of the show have taken significant steps to make the show *much* more Vendor-Friendly.  Now attendees actually have to walk through the vendor area before viewing the Display Gardens (and I believe they've lowered the cost for booth-space)...  

Before I get too rambly (HA!), I'll say that the "walk through the vendor space" was a very effective technique because - somehow or other - I ended up getting sucked-into a sales pitch from a Traeger Pellet-grill Rep!

Now everybody knows what a Ho I am, when it comes to good BBQ.  And I have shared some of my Smoking (Mis)Adventures on this very blog.  I'm still limping along with the Pedazo-de-mierda Brinkmann Electric Smoker (did a tri-tip a few weeks ago - came out "pretty okay" - but I mis-timed everything and the meat got cooked before the smoke even got started - ooooops!), but I think I'm about ready to "graduate" to something nicer.  And - much as I hated the "Last hot dog in the ballpark" sales spiel from the Traeger-dude - I did find myself very intrigued over the whole pellet-cooker idea.

Of course, I am not one to spend $400+ on a whim (Well, except for Stormageddon!) (Although it *did* take me a month to complete that Impulse Purchase!).  The Sales-Dude was really... "motivated" (yeah, that's the word!) to sell me a cooker.  Once he determined that my Price-Point was "CHEAP," he focused on trying to get me to buy the Jr. Elite model which is little-more than a tailgate smoker in size. And he kept throwing in "extras" to entice me to buy: Free grill cover!  Cookbook (srsly?!).  I'll even throw-in a 20# bag of pellets...

Long story short:  I didn't buy it.  I wanted something bigger - *and* I wanted to do more research.  

Researching pellet-smokers is kinda like stapling Jell-O to a tree.  Broad assortment.  Many different "features."  Huge price differences (with the general consensus being "You get what you pay for.").  Many websites were surfed.  Amazon (especially the customer reviews), AmazingRibs.com, Pelletheads.com, were some of the main ones.  There were others, I'm sure!  Pretty mind-boggling, to tellya the truth!

The general gist of  these pellet smokers is that you fill a hopper with hardwood cooking pellets (they look like rabbit food), and there is an auger assembly that feeds the pellets into the cooking chamber.  At the bottom of the cooking chamber is a burn pot which has a glow-plug and fan to ignite the pellets and keep them cooking.  There are also thermometers incorporated into the unit that create a feedback loop.  Basically, you dial-in the temperature you want, and the thermometer tells the auger to deliver more (or less) pellets to the cooker in order to maintain the desired temperature.

Kind-of / Almost "Set it and Forget it!"  Which is WAY better than having to constantly fuss, and add wood chunks, and hope it doesn't over-smoke, and oh-crap-need-to-soak-more-wood, and is it DONE yet?!

Some pellet smokers have less temperature control (Low-Med-Hi), some have what-are-called PID controllers which are supposed to dial-in temps even closer.  Hell, some have WiFi controls so that you can monitor (and even turn on/off) your cooker from your phone!  It seems that most of the "decent" smokers are gonna start in the $500 range, but you can easily spend thousands of dollars!

Yep.  Mind-boggling!

I ended up going with the Camp Chef PG24DLX - more than ample-enough for the two of us, but still large enough for a Pool-BQ party.  Beer-can chicken oughtta fit in there, just fine.  I bet I could even smoke a decent-sized turkey breast in there!

Some of the "features" that I liked about it were:

• It does have a dial-in temperature control (160 - 500*, in 25* increments).  It is not PID, however.
• It has a pellet-purge function
• Clean-out is pretty simple. Just pull a lever that "dumps" the ashes into a cup (so you don't have to completely disassemble the grill and suck-up ashes after every use).

Size and Price seemed about right.  Big, but not huge.  And under $600 (all-in - including shipping). Spendy, but (I hope) a worthwhile investment!

I bought it from OutdoorCooking.com.  Got a free custom grill-cover and shipping was quick and free (Not Amazon-Fast, but still very reasonable) - and I am very satisfied, so far!

Unboxing:

Man, I have never seen a FedEx driver deliver and disappear so quickly!  He had a huge hand-truck and was able to drop the package on our front step, banged on the door and ran like hell!  Had it been my UPS guy, I have no doubt he would've stuck around and been willing to drop the (very large/very bulky/very heavy) box in my backyard.  Ah well!

w00t!  My new smoker is here!

I grabbed our hand-truck and quickly discovered that it was too heavy/bulky for me to maneuver onto the hand-truck on my own (and Hubs was out of town on business).  I texted my neighbor - to no avail.  Then - realizing that at least the box was up *one* step - I figured that MAYBE I could wrestle it onto our flatbed cart.  Yay!  Success!

I got it to the backyard and waited til late afternoon to begin The Un-Boxing!!

Oh dear, what have I gotten myself into???

Actually, I have to say that this thing was *very* well-packaged, in heavy-duty cardboard and super-sturdy styrofoam.  The cool thing was - once you lifted-off the big upper box/lid, the inner-box (which was highly resistant to my box-cutter) actually doubled as a soft assembly surface.  I gave-up on slicing the cardboard at the corners and, instead, cut the tape that was holding the bottom-box together.  Once the tape was sliced, the box fell-down flat.  Well, it would have - had I decided to assemble it in a large unobstructed area!  Instead, it was leaning-up against my table-legs and trash bins!  I was able to maneuver it around a bit, so it was mostly flat.  But bottom-line: Excellent packaging by Camp Chef because assembling it on cardboard kept me from scratching the hell out of it!

It came with a good, well-written instruction manual.  I'm pleased to say that most of the assembly was "done" before I opened it.  I just had to install the legs, chimney, handle and right shelf.  Finding all of the pieces was kind of fun:  The legs were inside of the cooking chamber.  I didn't figure that out 'til I'd already laid it on it's back.  

She's got leeeeeggggs!

She knows how to use 'em....!

(Sorry - channeling ZZ-Top!)

Nah - all things considered, this was pretty Easy-Peasy to assemble and I did it all myself in less than an hour (with plenty of margarita breaks!).  

Ain't she purdy?!

So yeah - Easy to assemble.  Well packaged. Shipped quickly.  Free cover (sorry no photo of that yet - but it's awesome!).

And since I didn't want hubbie to feel left-out, I let him deal with all the cardboard and styrofoam! See how thoughtful I am?!!  Oh, and then he gets to go 'round and tighten all the nuts and bolts that my girly wrists couldn't tighten sufficiently!

Okay, I think that's enough for one day.  I'll post more - after I finish the "christening" of my new smoker (which is happening today - Right Now, in fact!)

"Virtual" Real Estate Shopping

Yep.  The blog's called Random Ramblings, so sometimes sh*t just comes outta left field.

Deal with it!

Here's a recent email:

More AZ Real Estate Adventures...

Okay, this one doesn't really rely on pictures so much.

Other than this one:

Which came with the email and, honestly, looks very appealing to me.

1 acre - horse property - $50K.  Not bad.

So I took the next logical step and pulled up the address on Google Maps and took a Virtual Drive of the neighborhood.  Plus this gives me the chance to check-out the mountain views - are they *really* that close, or did the realtor have a *really* good zoom on his camera, right?

So I checked out the 'hood.  Other than the redneck across the street who's storing his camper shell on the ground in the middle of his horse paddock, the neighborhood doesn't seem *too* bad.  I vaguely recall 'virtual-shopping' this property before, but anyway...

Then I do a Zillow search.  Odd.  It doesn't come up - even though the address pre-filled itself as I was typing (so yeah, I'd looked at this one before)...

Then I head to Trulia.  It shows that the property has been on the market for over 120 days - which seems odd because it *looks* like a nice piece of property, and $50K is a damn good deal for views like that!

Extremely strange that it hasn't been snatched up by now.  Hmmm.....

Then I scroll down and discover a feature that I didn't know Trulia had:

And now I've got "Bad Boys Bad Boys, What'cha Gun Do!" stuck in my head!

Damn!

Crafty Crap: Dollar Tree Mason-Jar Solar Lights (and Doggie-Rambling)

I can't imagine that this is a unique idea, but I figured I'd post it just the same!  Oh, and I'll probably start-out rambly - so consider yourself warned!!

See, we've got a "Special Needs Dog," Tazz-The-Spazz.  She has shattered all of my Old-Wiener-Dog Records by living well beyond the 14-1/2 year mark.  In fact, she is approaching 16 now!  She is our "Full-Throttle-Dog" who has always lived life to the fullest!  Our racing champ, and a veteran of multiple surgeries (including two neuro-surgeries for her back - which makes her OFFICIALLY more expensive than my Harley!).  

Tazz has definitely slowed WAY down in her Golden Years.  But, thus far, she still seems to be comfortable and happy - and I am committed to keeping her that way.  Her meals are all home-cooked (ground turkey and rice), she takes glucosamine daily, and when she feels creaky (i.e. rainy, cold days), we give her Rimadyl (basically doggie-aspirin).  If she ever reaches a point where we can't keep her comfortable...  Well, we'll make the appropriate "decision" for her.  But let's not go there, k?!

Seriously, she's still doing Pretty-Okay for an old girl.  She gives herself exercise by having "walkabouts" in the yard - usually 2-3 times per day - she walks the perimeter (and it's a mighty-long perimeter, especially considering that her legs are only about 3" long!).  

And she *still* gets excited when papa throws her tennis ball.  Seriously!  This dog is absolutely POSSESSED when papa throws the ball.  Now when mama throws it, "Meh!" She'll kinda half-heartedly galumph for a stride or two, then slow to a ramble.  But papa?!  Hell, she RUNS!  If she catches it on a bounce, she'll roll around on the grass in sheer delight!   She even still brings the ball back - on "good" days - but she's a far cry from the OCD Ball-Chasing Lunatic that she used to be (When it got so bad, we'd have to take her ball away.  She droves us absolutely CRAZY)

Yay!  Papa's throwing the ball!

We are making reasonable accommodations for her.  Her hearing isn't what it used to be, and her vision is definitely deteriorating.  We've had to keep the pool covered this summer (due to the drought - we want to minimize evaporation), and I am terrified of the dog falling in and slipping under the cover.  So we installed "landing lights" around the pool (solar rope lights).

Weenie-Dog Landing Lights
(view from the diving board end)

Cooler-lookin' view - including the TiKi BaR
We don't leave the pool-light on when it's covered

Just the rope lights around the perimeter

We also installed a Doggie-Door for Tazz, and she has the luxury of "freedom" to sleep wherever she chooses (the youngsters sleep in their crate).  Tazz sleeps, pretty-much, all of the time!  But she alternates between her two beds in the family room (one with a doggie-heating-pad and woobie, and a second unheated bed), and the doggie-bed/woobie combo in the kitchen.  

She seemed to be having some trouble locating the doggie-door at night, however, so I bought some cheap solar lights from the Dollar Tree (that kept falling over and rolling away!).

Okay, so THAT brings us to my Crafty Crap post! (Jeez!  FINALLY!)

Last week, this showed-up in my In-Box from Living Social:

Hey - Crappy cell-phone pic!

$14.99 for one solar mason jar light 

$39.99 for three.  Plus $3.99 shipping

Seemed like a cool idea.  But at almost $20 apiece I was *not* feelin' the love!  Hey - I've got all these tippy-over solar lights in the yard already, and Gawd-knows I've got a sh*t-ton of canning jars!  Maybe I can make some myself!  Here is what I did:

All the stuff you'll need:

(Minus the better-battery)

Start with a Dollar Tree Lamp like thus:

 It's actually a pretty cool-lookin' lamp

But unstable as hell!

Our Dollar Tree had a few of 'em left (end of summer).  They had black or white available, but I think they came in other colors as well - doesn't matter.  Also, you don't *have* to use this specific lamp - look for anything that has a top "puck" (circled below) that will fit inside the top ring of a mason  jar. 

The circled part is the only piece you'll need.

Next thing you're gonna do is take the lamp apart.  Remove the shade (which blows away when it tips over anyway!), then unscrew the top "puck" which contains the LED bulbs, a battery and the solar panel on top.  You may or may not want to use the bulb cover/diffuser (white cover directly under the "puck").

Cost, so far, $1.00

Now this next step was one I'd skipped, the first time around.  But it's a necessary step!  See, Dollar Tree lamps come with anemic AAA 100mAh Ni-Cd batteries that will not last through the night (they actually only stay lit for about an hour).  

Replace that bad-boy with something "juicier!"  I happened to have some 850mAh NiMHs laying around.  Google tells me that you can find even juicier rechargeable AAA's for appx $2.00 apiece.

This particular lamp has two teeny screws.  Unscrew 'em and open the puck to reveal the battery:

Anemic battery (yellow) - Dump it!
Better Battery on the right

Now I should note that the overall construction on my Dollar Tree lamp was...  Well, it's a Dollar-Tree Made-In-China piece of crap!  There are little clips at the top and bottom of the battery that wanted to pop-out while I was replacing the battery.  It required a little dexterity, but wasn't too difficult to complete the battery swap.  You do need the clips in place, and in contact with the battery terminals, otherwise it won't light up.  Put the thing back together and you're ALMOST done!

Cost so far:  Figure $3.00 (I'm still at $1.00 'cause I already had the batteries!)

Okay, next is fitting the "puck" into the mason jar ring.  Dollar Tree does carry mason jars, but I think the ring-opening on the top is a squee-bit bigger than the standard Ball/Kerr jar rings.  It really doesn't matter - as long as the puck is a fairly close fit.  You're gonna tweak-it larger by running electrical tape around the outside of the puck.  For mine, 4-5 layers of tape got me a good snug fit:

Dollar Tree sells electrical tape - Bada-Bing!

Next, you''re gonna want to snugly-fit the tape-wrapped puck into the top of your mason lid/ring and screw it onto the jar.  Now, depending upon whether you get rain in summer (not-so-much in parched California!), you might want to run another round of electrical tape at the point where the light-puck meets the jar-ring - to keep water from getting inside.  I don't think that water would hurt the light, but I would imagine it could get pretty "funky" in there if water got inside the jar.

Easy Peasy!

Cost so far: $4.00 (assuming you bought the jar at Dollar Tree - and I'm not counting the electrical tape in the cost)

So this is "okay" right now, but it's not gonna shine very brightly without something to help diffuse the light.  As I'd mentioned earlier, you could just use the lamp-cover/diffuser that came with the lamp.  I had originally considered buying a can of glass-frost spray at Home Depot, but my Dollar-Tree Compadre, P, came up with the brilliant idea of using glass pebbles in the jar (from Dollar Tree - Heyo!).

So, fill your jar almost-to-the-top with glass blobby-pebbles.  A pint-jar will use almost two full bags of pebbles.  And I would suggest using "mostly" clear pebbles, with maybe a few scattered colors.  You'll see, later, how the different color combos worked out, after dark.

Here is the first lamp, filled with mostly aqua-colored glass blobs:

Purdy!
(but not very bright, unfortunately)

Total Cost: About $6.00 apiece (Lamp $1 + Battery $2 + Jar $1 + Glass Blobs $2)  :-D

Okay, more pics...

Here are two jars - out in the sunshine.  The one on the left is the mostly-aqua blobs.  The one on the right is all-clear blobs in a blue jar.  The one on the right also has the "extra" electrical tape (for waterproofing), but I did a sloppy job with that (which is why I decided it wasn't necessary in parched-California!).

Even Purdier!

Oh, and they are definitely NOT 

gonna tip-over in the wind!

What was interesting:  I played around with the clear-blob lamps, after dark, and I really didn't notice a difference between clear-blobs in a blue jar vs. clear-blobs in a clear jar.  So if you want "pretty" in the daylight, and decent lighting after dark, use the blue jars with clear-blobs.  The colored-blobs really do cut-down on the amount of light, so I recommend sticking with clear-blobs, and maybe toss in a few random colored blobs for interest...

Okay, most of my "after-dark" pics were pretty crappy and, honestly, they aren't super accurate.  The camera compensated with a long-exposure so the pics appear brighter than they are in person.  Nevertheless, here are some pics:

Left: Aqua Blobs in Clear Jar

Right: Clear Blobs in Blue Jar

Left: Same as above

Right: Clear Blobs in Clear Jar

(not much difference)

Then, since I'd run out of glass blobs, I decided to make one more - using the plastic diffuser thingy from the original Dollar Tree Lamp.  Here are 3 together - next to the Doggie Door:

Left: Aqua Blobs in clear glass (least light)

Center: Clear in Clear

Right: Diffuser in Blue

So there you have it!  My (successful) attempt at making solar-powered mason-jar lamps for *well* under $20!  I like 'em and, while they aren't super-duper-bright, they do the job!  Tazz can find her way to the back door after dark!  Yayyy Me!

Just call me the Crazy Chicken Lady (Part 2)!

Ooh.  Am I keeping my promise to *continue* this Tale Most Fowl?!

Why yes, I am!  (Scary sh*t - I know!!!)

So - where we left-off:  I had placed an order from a local hatchery (A Hatchery in California - but I won't name them, specifically) back in March, right?

Auto-Responder email:  We will ship your chicks on June 16.

Srsly?  THREE MONTHS?!!  

Umm. Okay...

So I got to work with "getting ready."  Bought my coop.  Put it together.  Hired a friend's son to do the "beefing up."  Then I waited.  And waited.  And waited...

In the meantime, I'm reading all of the local "Chicken Message Boards" and hearing about all these "Baby Chick" opportunities (4-H, Local Feed-stores, yada-yada).  Nope.  I've got chicks on order - just gotta be patient!

June 16, I get the Shipment-Notification email...  They're being over-nighted to my local post-office.  So - first thing on Tuesday June 17, I call the post office to let 'em know I am expecting a shipment of live chicks "Please call me when they arrive - I don't want them going out in a hot truck!"

9:45am, I get a call from the post office.  10:00am, I am there to pick 'em up!

Post-Office Lady brings me my (suspiciously quiet) package.  I opened it - only to discover five DEAD chicks.

Hatchery guarantees satisfaction, so I snapped a pic of my FIVE DEAD CHICKS and sent 'em an email.  I also tried calling - only to discover that they don't answer their phone (Message says "Send us an email").

Several emails back-and-forth.  End result: "We cannot issue a refund.  We can send you a replacement shipment - IN AUGUST - "when it's cooler."  

Excuse me?! You're in the Central Valley (where temps are ROUTINELY in the triple-digits)...  Not sure if, maybe, you're in a different State of California but I am 110% certain that it is NOT "cooler" in August!

Admittedly, I am pretty-spoiled with Amazon Prime and free 2-day shipping.  I've gotten fairly accustomed to having my orders arrive *mere minutes* after I hit "Submit!" (Okay, I exaggerate a little!).  I'm just not comfortable with waiting FIVE MONTHS for an order placed in March, right?!

"No. That is not acceptable, please refund my money."

Followed by Radio Silence!  No reply from the hatchery....

"Well, f**k you and the horse you rode in on!"

The Sucky Part was:  When I paid for my online order, I chose "PayPal" as my payment method.  Now I know, from past experience, that PayPal is pretty strict with their timelines.  I pretty-much *knew* that PayPal wasn't gonna help me with my purchase (over 90 days old) so - screw that - I went straight to my credit card company (and I *know* I am in good-standing with them - MASSIVE limits, High-Usage, Prompt Payment History, and Very-Impressive Credit-Score).

Chase, as it turns out, was *most* sympathetic and VERY willing to accommodate my charge-back request.  Yay for them!

So my next email, to the (Nameless HATCHERY in CALIFORNIA) was something of a Hum-Dinger!  My Mom - back in her heyday - was a force to be reckoned-with, whenever she went-off on one of her Letter-Writing Campaigns (she wielded a Mighty Poison Pen!).  Thankfully, I inherited mom's Poison-Pen Letter-Writing-Skills.  I pretty-much let 'em have it with both barrels.  The general gist being "We can do this the easy way - or the hard way!  You can either cancel my order and refund my money, or else I'll initiate a charge-back thru my Credit Card *AND* I will notify the Better Business Bureau, Yelp, and ALL of the 'Backyard Chicken Forums' that I belong to..."

Long-Story-Short (too late!).  The very next morning, I saw that a refund had been initiated by the hatchery. Yay!

Of course, that still left me with an empty coop.  But at least I wasn't stuck paying $95.00 for a box of dead chickens, right?!

Sooooo....  Next up:  A "Lurker is De-Lurking" post to the Silicon Valley Chickens board...

I expressed my desire to obtain 3 chicks/hens that would produce different colored eggs - but that I really-really-really wanted a White-Crested Black-Polish.

No luck on the White-Crested Black Polish, but a gal up in Fremont had a few extra Silver-Laced and Golden-Laced Polish pullets that she would be willing to sell me.

SCORE!!!

Soooooo...  Meet The Girls (dubbed my "Vegas Showgirls" by a Facebook Friend!)

Meet Tina Turner!

And Phyllis Diller-Miller!

So this is the point where I should be happy, right?  And I am.  Don't get me wrong.  I actually like having pullets (kinda like a teenager).  I don't need to give-up Studio Space for a temporary brooder (cardboard box with heat lamp).  These girls should start laying sooner, so all is good - right?!

Wellllll... They are *supposed* to be hens - but no guarantee (and Roosters are verboten in suburban San Jose!).  So I'm keeping an eye on The Vegas Showgirls and - sadly - Tina-Turner looks like she might be developing "saddle feathers" (sorry - no decent pics - but "saddle feathers" are long, skinny feathers that form over the "rump" and drape-down on either side of the tail-feathers).  If Tina turns into Tony (Tina starts crowing), then Tina gots 'ta go!  And that would leave me with ONE lonely hen.  Not a good situation!

So now I'm fretting about what the hell am I gonna do if Tina is really Tony, and how am I gonna get rid of him, and how am I gonna get another "compatible" hen if that's the case, and yada-yada...?

Yeah.  I'm neurotic.  Deal with it!

Yeah...  So...  Jury's still out on the whole "Tina vs. Tony" issue.  But I figure it can't hurt to ask the Chicken-Gal if she has any more "extra" Polish Pullets she'd be willing to sell to me.  As luck would have it, she did have one more Silver-Laced Polish Pullet that she was willing to let-go.  So I drove up, last night, and picked up another "girl."

Meet Henny Kravitz (she has less gray than Phyllis - so at least I can tell 'em apart!)

Henny seems to be adapting, okay.  But Phyllis, as it turns out, is a bit of a bully.  Nevertheless, I think they are "transitioning" okay (certainly easier than trying to introduce new "babies" to the mix).

And - added bonus - I got to check out some adult Polish Hens and, it turns out, that the Saddle Feathers (that had me so freaked-out) may NOT be indicative of Tina being a rooster.  So - worst-case - I end up with three (low-productivity) hens.  So not a bad situation at all - since it's just Hubs and Me (and we aren't HUGE egg-eaters!).

So yeah - bottom line: I've got three chickens now.  Hopefully, all are "hens:" - but I have a backup plan if one turns out to be a rooster.  Now it's just a waiting game to make sure that all ARE, in fact, hens.  Then we get eggs to eat!

Right now I am working on acclimating them to "cuddling!"  I go out, twice a day, to pick 'em up and hand-feed 'em.  And they get treats galore (mushy peaches? - YUM!).  I have determined that they *don't* like Super-Hot Weather (got to over 103* in the shade, earlier this week!), so I've setup a shade-umbrella over their run and am looking into buying a hose-end mister - to keep 'em cool on the Super-Hot Days (fortunately - not super-common around here).

Anyhooooo...  I am SUPER happy to have my new Vegas Showgirls!  More to come, I'm sure.....

xoxo

-QT

Just call me the Crazy Chicken Lady (Part 1)

Ooh.  I'm back!

I'm gonna get all Rambly on ya!  You have been warned!

Annnnnd, I am blogging on my severely anemic Netbook, so I'll probably have to post pictures later (when I'm on my laptop).  Not sure if I'll post and update - or just keep it sitting in drafts - or just post crappy, unedited phone pics.  Who knows?!  

Plus - I've got TWO things to post about!  So that might result in two (or more!) new posts! 

(Nnnnnoooooo!!!) 

(Yes!  Srsly!!)

First up:  CHICKENS!

I know I've blathered-on about liking my fresh, organic produce.  I belong to a CSA, and we've got a pretty-stinkin'-awesome Farmer's Market, on Sundays year-round, just down the street from my house.

Lately, I have been REALLY enjoying Farm-Fresh Eggs.  Good-Friend-P had 4 chickens (two of which were ostensibly "mine"), so I used to get my eggs from her.  Now she's down to two hens - and they're not as productive anymore.  So I've been getting my eggs from the weekly farmer's market.

Then I got the Wild-@$$ed idea that I oughtta get chickens of my own.  Yes, we can own chickens in suburban San Jose.  I think we are limited to 6 "small animals" (so 3 dogs + 3 chickens).  Hens only.  And the coop has to be situated at least 20 feet from the nearest residence...

The thing is, I didn't want your plain ol' "garden variety" chicken.  No sirree!  I wanted "Exotic" chickens!  And (here we go with rambling and reminiscing!) we used to have chickens when I was younger.  

(Odd, how I have so many memories associated with chickens! lol)

Back when I was 13 or 14, Dad and I got "exiled" to mom's recently-inherited Utah home.  Long, boring story, but we spent two years living in my grandparents' teeny little 2BR/1BA house on one acre of land (surrounded by 18 acres of pasture - which was bequeathed to my uncles).  We had barns and sheds and even an outhouse! (although, thankfully, the house *did* have indoor plumbing!).  Anyway, Dad and I had loads of fun "Playing Farmer" on mom's inheritance.  We had dogs, goats, ducks, geese, a horse (much to my mother's dismay), an FFA steer (briefly), and a whooooole lot of chickens.

Now I am 100% San Francisco Bay Area Native - born-n-raised - so my Farm-Sense was somewhat lacking.  We had found a local chicken-farm - with all kinds of exotic breeds - and dad would take me there to pick out chickens.  I, being the complete-and-utter-noob, was drawn to the "pretty ones."  And the "pretty ones," generally-speaking, were roosters!  So our "farmyard" consisted of the aforementioned menagerie, as well as a WHOLE LOTTA frustrated roosters!

(in retrospect, I'm sure the guys at the chicken farm must've LOVED us - since we took all of the roosters off their hands!).

Anyway, we had White Leghorns, Rhode Island Reds, Easter-Eggers, and a whole slew of Banties (Bantam Game-Cocks, Mille Fleurs, Cochins, and probably a bunch more that I can't recall offhand).  There was one breed that I always wanted, but we could never find: Polish.

So, since I got this wild idea - NOW (Jeez, almost 40 years later?! I feel like such a Geezer!) - By Gawd, I am gonna GET my Polish Chicken!

Polish Chickens come in Bantam and Standard sizes.  I figure, since we want eggs worth eating, Standard was the way to go.  

Okay, gonna condense a lot of Rambly-Blah-Blah-Blahs here and say that I found a "somewhat local" hatchery, online, that carried my much-coveted Polish chickens (specifically, White-Crested Black Polish).

  

C'mon...  Tell me that isn't a cool-lookin' chicken!!

I ordered my Polish hen (lays white eggs), an Ameracauna (lays green eggs), and something else (can't recall - but it laid brown eggs).  I figured I was being all "Scientifical" about it - buying hens that laid different colored eggs so I could tell Who's-Who, right?  And Good-Friend-P also wanted two baby-chicks, so I added hers to my order as well...

I placed my order back in March, and got an Auto-Responder email that said that they'd ship my day-old chicks in --- MID-JUNE 

(WTF?!).

I briefly considered cancelling my order but then realized that I totally wasn't ready (what-with not owning a chicken-coop and all that), so I let it ride...

So then I surfed online and found a reasonably-priced chicken coop on Frugah.com.  Not gonna bother linking b/c they don't carry the same coop anymore.  So I got my coop (it was surprisingly easy to assemble, actually).  I also "beefed it up" a bit by adding hasps (and padlocks) to deter raccoons and opossums (which we do have in our 'hood), and stapled hardware mesh to the bottom (again, critter-deterrents).

My coop, before I added hasps and locks and turned it into Fort Knox!

Then I waited for my chicks' arrival.  I even cleared a space in the TiKi-ShAcK for a temporary box-brooder...

Ya know what?!  I'm gonna be a total bee-atch and say that this seems like a good "stopping point!"  HA!  How Rude?!

To Be Continued........

Yup. Still alive. How 'bout a Garden Update?

Rats.  I don't seem to be getting Traffic Reports for the blog anymore (probably because I haven't posted a damned thing for months ???  No clue!).  I *am* on Pinterest though, and I get notifications when my pins get shared.  That's another good way to "gauge" what folks are interested in, when they 'interact' with me.

It still feels like I'm more of a Foodie Blogger - since those are the posts (and pins) that seem to get the most traffic.  But I'm trying my damndest to be a Garden Blogger too!

I'm also a lazy blogger - but you already knew that! - so my latest update is an edited Copy/Paste of an email I sent to my Garden Coach at Indie-Farms.  If you're an SF Bay Area Gardener who needs help and/or ideas, check 'em out!  

HYDROPONICS:

Hydro-Lime is doing *quite* well - in spite of two pump fubars!

The first occurred while we were out of town for a long-weekend.  One of the emitters escaped the hydroton and proceeded to dump nutes all over the ground (the weeds were most appreciative!).  Pump ran dry and died - Grrr!

Quick run to Home Depot to pick up a "lesser" pump (orig pump was 250 GPH, HD pump was 150 GPH).  The HD pump kinda sucked eggs.  I removed the 2GPH emitter-doohickeys at the end of the drip-lines so that the nutes could actually circulate.  Seemed "okay" - but I didn't trust it.  So I ordered a replacement 250GPH pump from Amazon.

Long story short: I'm keeping the cheesy HD pump as a back-up and I'm back to using the new 250 GPH pump - sans emitter-doohickeys.  Once again, one of the drip-lines escaped - but I noticed it during TiKi TiMe and was able to prevent another disaster.  And now I've tied everything together with twine so the drip lines can't escape.  Not very "elegant" - but it seems to be working!

Hydro-Lime tree looks *very* happy with lots of baby limes - Mmmmm!  It's putting out new growth, as well.  Nice and GREEN.  Me = Happy!

I think I may have some "challenges" when the tree gets bigger (although it is a dwarf variety).  Not sure how I'll support it as it grows - right now, it's just got the same bamboo stake that it came with.  I guess I'll burn that bridge when I get there...

What else is cool:  I've got an AeroGarden - growing culinary herbs - over the kitchen sink.  Well, the AeroGarden has it's own on-board system that tells me to change the nutes every two weeks.  I'm using that as my "clock" (calendar?) to tell me when to change-out the solution in the Hydro-Lime.  And the old solution gets recycled by watering my other patio planters.  Win-Win!

Couple of random Hydro-Lime Progress Pics (sorry, I don't have the energy nor attention span to crop 'em and pretty 'em up!)

I also had a crazy idea about building a hydroponic strawberry planter - but I never got past "Gee, that's an interesting idea" stage!  I'm okay with experimenting with my hydro-lime, for now...

OTHER VEGGIES:

Raised beds: Doing okay.  I'm only using 2 of the beds, this year.  The third (Former-Finny-Farm) is a giant compost pile - soon to be a Chicken Playground (let *them* turn my compost, right?!).  The other two beds have Artie the Artichoke, squashes, pumpkins, corn, beans and melons (Three Sisters Planting!).  Plus maybe a volunteer tomato (or two), and 3 volunteer sunflowers.  

Oh, and "Surprise Potatoes!"  All winter, I was tossing old squishy potatoes out into the garden beds (mostly in the Compost Bed).  Many have grown and I have to be careful when digging because We've Got Spuds!

Anyhoooo...  Veggie vines are growing quite nicely.  I've seen some blossoms - but no fruit yet.

Random Garden Pics:

 Raised beds - before weeding (back in April)

 Tomatillo blossoms

 Artie!

 Artie lost his head!

Artie's bed with "Three Sisters" planting of squash, beans and corn

Patio 'Maters:  So I had to limit myself to 6 'Mater Plants this year (:::GASP:::).  I've got them in my Grow-Box Self Watering Planters.  Plants look PHENOMENAL!!!  This year, I opted for the "Organic" Mulch-Mats (Jobe's Organic Fertilizer - Meh!).  I used fresh organic potting soil (can't remember which brand - but NOT Home-Depot, k?!), and amended with Worm Poop before planting.

Maters are as tall as me now.  Of course, I had to raise the planters to keep 'em out of dogs' reach (damned omnivores!).  I've seen quite a few flowers, and - yay Stupice! - I've even got a few baby maters!

Random Mater Pictures:

 Transplant Day - April 19

 May 10 - Lookin' good...

 May 17 - Flowers! :-D

 May 17 - They're growing quickly (and I have to keep weaving them back into the cage/supports!)

 May 21 (I'm starting to regret not setting-up my Plant-Cam!)

 June 5 - as tall as me now!

  First 'Maters!  Stupice variety

CHICKENS (Compost-Turners):

Ooh!  I forgot to tell my Bloggie Buddies!  I'm getting chickens!

Due to arrive June 16.  Pretty excited about that!  I think they'll live in my studio for the first few weeks.  Originally, I thought I could keep 'em in the greenhouse but - SUMMER WEATHER! - Yeah, it gets well over 100* in the greenhouse during the day.  Not too eager for "roasted chicken!"  Studio is insulated, and I think I'll re-purpose one of my seedling heat mats to keep the chickies warm 'til they feather-out.

Random Chicken Pics:

 My (empty) chicken coop!  I fear it may be a bit too small for 3 hens (although I did select smallish breeds).

 Not my chicken! This is an Ameracauna Hen, they lay green eggs (srsly!)

Ameracaunas aren't too "uniform" in appearance.  I have no idea if this is what my hen is gonna look like!

 Golden Buff Hen.  Lays brown eggs (again, not my chicken!)

White Crested Black Polish (you *know* I'm gonna name her Tina Turner!).  Lays white eggs.  

And no, not my chicken!

My chickens are coming from a hatchery in Modesto, CA.  I suspect they are still "eggs" right now - but due to hatch soon!

And I really-really-really hope I don't end up with any "Surprise!" Roosters.  We can't have roosters in San Jose, so cross your fingers, k?!

DROOPY DRUPES:

Gonna have a bumper-crop of Santa Rosa Plums.  I'd say in a matter of days. I'm good for a couple of jamming sessions...  Maybe a pie or cobbler or two - but I'm gonna have WAY more plums than I-know-what-to-do-with! (My inner Grammar Nazi just cringed!). I'll probably look into the local food-bank(s) - although I have a sneaking suspicion that they do not take backyard produce.  If not, there's always neighbors, Facebook and Freecycle!

 Feb 16 - Plum Blossoms

 April 29

 June 5 - there's gonna be a LOT of plums!

June 5 - I think about another week 'til harvest time!

I think Satsuma Plum Tree will be bearing fruit for the first time.  Not "insane" like Santa Rosa, though.  I love Satsuma Plums (deep purple flesh, all the way through - goozy and juicy so you look like a vampire after eating 'em!)

These Satsuma babies are about the size of cherries!

White Peaches will also be INSANE this year.  And possibly early - not sure.  I culled a lot of babies, but not nearly enough.  Gonna be LOTS of smallish peaches.  I may need to prop-up some of the heavier branches so I don't have another disaster this year.

Yellow Peaches (later harvest).  Not a HUGE harvest - of course, I thought that last year (and I recall that I *literally* had nightmares over the quantity of peaches I harvested, last summer!).  Bigger fruits on the Yellow Tree, and hopefully not *quite* as abundant as last year!

Peachy Peaches:

 Feb 16 - Peach Blossoms + Bonus Pollinator (on the right)

 March 28 - Baby White Peaches (Early Bearer)

 April 16 - White Peaches comin' along...

 June 5 - White peaches still have a few weeks to go...

June 5 - Yellow Peaches (Later harvest - probably late July-ish)

No cherries this year - Boo! (But I heard it's a crappy cherry year - all around).

CITRUS (Other):

Mandarin and Dirty Lime look like sh*t.  Dirty Lime does have some fruit, but it does NOT look happy.  Mandarin looks like it's barely clinging to life (this, in spite of using my leftover nutes for watering, AND amending with a boatload of worm-poop!).  Oh, and they were both potted-up, late last year, with fresh potting mix.  

A buddy of mine (who used to live in Vegas), told me that they used to amend their citrus trees with Chelated Iron.  No clue if that's organic or not (I'm guessing "not") - but I'm getting desperate - so I ordered a jug from Amazon.  I'll mix up a weak batch and try a soil-soak.  Not sure I want to do foliar application since I *do* have fruit on the lime tree.  But the leaves are looking very sickly and yellow, and I've gotta do *something!*

Fussy Dirty Citrus Pics, taken June 5 (I'm almost embarrassed to post these!  But maybe I'll get some killer "After" shots if I can ever solve my chlorosis woes!)

 Dirty Lime does have some fruit...

 I'm pretty sure Bearss Limes aren't supposed to have variegated leaves!

Sicky Mandarin

Allllrighty then!  How's that for a Garden Update?  I'm not even gonna waste your time with my usual "blah-blah-gonna-post-more-often" crap.  I'll post when I can!  

Happy Gardening!!!